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  • billytombs

kid·hol·ly·wood·land·ex·per·i·ment

i feel artistically schizophrenic. i've been working in so many different directions for so long that i believe i have fractured my brain. i wrote in this previous note about my obsessive - probably compulsive - writing habit. and i have behaved in much the same way as a builder, painter, photographer, filmmaker, actor & human ... & i keep trying to come up with some kind of name or some kind of title that can describe how i feel about my self and what it is i do. throughout my life i've tried on a cacophony of monikers and epithets in this pursuit.

i've been trying like hell to unify myself & my work. i don't want to be a writer or a painter or a builder or an actor or a filmmaker. i want to be a whatever it is that i am at the intersection of those things.

am i complicating things? or simplifying them?

i think it must be a similar type brain glitch to what i've been trying to sort out with periods & ellipses - something about the fluidity of my world view - i'm not sure...

anyway, this #kidhollywoodlandexperiment is, in short, an attempt to bring my schizophrenic selves all into one room - to sit them down and see if they can play nice with one another.

it is a project with a very wide net - it is an attempt to heal my fractured brain - and to unify what constantly seems to be trying to divide. 

#kidhollywoodlandexperiment is no one thing - no one medium: but it does fly under one banner. it is a narrative that stretches itself from paint to performance to cinema. it is a heroic effort to bring it all under one roof... 

i am no where near completion and at the moment it still seems to be more than a bit ambiguous & amorphous.

this #kidhollywoodlandexperiment is a beast to wrangle. so keep watching me fall...  get up - wipe myself off - fall again...

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